I Thought I Was Ready
hi. my name's koda.
im 17 years old. i found out i was pregnant around april 2010. me and my bf have been together for 11&1/2 months now. i know this might sound kind of different, but me and my bf planned to have this baby. it started off as something great, and the thought of having this baby excited me. i thought i was ready and i thought i knew almost everything because of the experience i have with my nieces. turns out i was wrong. i don't regret making the decision, but i know it should have been something that i could have waited on. now i feel alone and scared.
im still living with my mom, but im afraid. i'm having a son, and hes due december 5th. im not finished high school, and my boyfriend isnt either. im going on assistance, but this isnt how i saw my life. i always thought i would be married and done college before i had a baby. having a baby, having to finish high school and college and a start off a career all seems like so much. i hear about success stories all the time, and i always think i can do it, but when reality sets in, im afraid of being a failure, i want nothing but whats best for my son and i will do anything. my bf is going to be making income from his schooling, but im still worried things wont work out as planned.everyone is trying to tell me everything will be fine, i just cant seem to let my guard down and breathe easy about it.
Dear Koda, My name is Meg and I help Becky with her letters sometimes...Thank you for being honest and vulnerable. When we are young and full of hormones we tend to make our own plans and expect to be the ONE who doesn't get backfired on...we always say, 'It wont happen to me, I am the exception', etc...but then we find ourselves up creek without a paddle sometimes and reflect back and go, 'well I guess maybe my parents were right, or well I guess that wasn't the best idea'...some of those things we can turn from and be done with and some of the decisions we make are lifelong roads to walk on....the good thing is that if you have the wisdom to see now where you were wrong then that means you are going to be a GREAT mom...it takes a person of solid character to admit when they were wrong, it takes the love and heart of a mother to want what is best for their child....You have that heart and although maybe this was not the most ideal decision you are going to make not only the best of it but you will be one of those many success stories...I know it....I want to encourage you to take the EXPERIENCE youhave and share it with others who do not. I am here for you, I would love to see a picture of your baby when your little guy is here....I am a December birthday as well....have you picked out names?....Much Love...Meg
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Comments
(24)
written by 41110 , April 11, 2011
i am knew to this web site. i just started today and the only thing i can tell you .is to have faith and always to be on the postive side. there so much more to life, this is just the begging . god does everything for a reason. just dont give up. and when you feel like your alone? just go on your knees and pray, ask god to help you
written by kkoops87 , March 19, 2011
Everyone who has abay is scared even when they have finished school and college and are married with a career. You just have to remember no matter what age you are or what things you have done your always going to have more to do and some things wont get done when you want them too but that doesnt mean you have to give up on them. I was a teen mom at 15 as a rape victim and yes I was scared and had no idea what I was doing, but if you dwell on all of these things your just going to make yourself sick as well as hurt your baby stress is a very strange thing. I know everythings all mixed up and you feel so alone and you feel as though no one understands because your situation is different from theirs and your right it is. However you will make it through this and you will be an incredible mother with a college degree. As for our boyfriend your very lucky most teen moms do it on their own but it sounds like you have an amazing support system. Just remember dont lose sight of what you want it will happen and in the end you will have everything you wanted even if it was a little out of order. I was 15 when I had my son im now 23 with 2 kids in school and a 5 month old. I managed to graduate high school as well as get a few certficates in the medical field and get married and Im still in school for RN it takes time and you may not have your career started when you had plan but eventually you will get there and it will be even better because you had to work extra hard and juggle more to get it.
written by andrea_rose , January 25, 2011
im andrea, and i found out i was pregnant when i was 14, almost 15. i was scared beyond belief, and at that time i couldnt even tell my sons father. i texted him to tell him because i was scared of the reaction i was going to get. i had the choices of adoption, abortion, or to keep him, is what my mom had told me. not even thinking i decided i was going to keep him, and through the months of being pregnant, i had lost all of my feelings for his father, but gained so much feeling for my beautiful baby boy. im still in school, and after i graduate from high school i plan on going to college. im still always scared and im still wrong on what to do at times, but my mom and my step dad help me so much. my babies father isnt in his life anymore, but my son is still happier than ever. he was born on 12-9-09, and it seems like yesterday that i had him. just live every moment of your life for your baby,
and cristina, your 17, yeah im 16, but live your teenage life before you decide to have a baby. yeah everything i just said is so positive about teenage pregnancy, but there are so many things that people dont evaluate. as in the cost, the time, and the stress that comes with a baby. wait until your able to afford and support a baby, cuz right now my mom does it all for me, and as great as that sounds, its really not. everytime my parents buy something for my son, i look at it and want to cry cuz i shouldve been the one paying for it, not them. its a lot of money, and i know that, but do you? try going to wal mart or another store and look at the cost of diapers, wipes, formula, baby food, baby clothes, beds, blankets, and even baby soap and baby powder. then you add in the medical bills, the medicines, and also the hospital bills from you giving birth. then multiply it all weekly for a yr. your not ready for that
and cristina, your 17, yeah im 16, but live your teenage life before you decide to have a baby. yeah everything i just said is so positive about teenage pregnancy, but there are so many things that people dont evaluate. as in the cost, the time, and the stress that comes with a baby. wait until your able to afford and support a baby, cuz right now my mom does it all for me, and as great as that sounds, its really not. everytime my parents buy something for my son, i look at it and want to cry cuz i shouldve been the one paying for it, not them. its a lot of money, and i know that, but do you? try going to wal mart or another store and look at the cost of diapers, wipes, formula, baby food, baby clothes, beds, blankets, and even baby soap and baby powder. then you add in the medical bills, the medicines, and also the hospital bills from you giving birth. then multiply it all weekly for a yr. your not ready for that
written by cristina123 , January 21, 2011
hi my names cristina and i am 17 i think am going throw wat ur going throw well me and my bf have been together 4 years and we say were ready to have a bby we realyy want to have one bt every body eals semms to disagree with that. i think am preg i realy hope i am thow .. i need to knw wat u think!¿? 
written by health_hd , January 21, 2011
You will get through it...trust me! My story is very similar to yours, except I became pregnant when I was 20. I was so afraid I wouldn't go to college because I was having a baby...to be honest, no one believed i would. I proved them wrong and worked so hard in school and graduated with my BA degree last May. It takes strong motivation to complete school whether it be high shcool or chollege, but when you look at your child that God has given you, it makes you want to succeed more in life. Your baby loves you and always remember that God gave you this child because he knows YOU would be the best for him. It will be a bumpy road, no doubt, but the bumps are well worth it. =) Good luck and i know you will be a great mommy. Message me if you ever need to talk.
written by purplequeen , January 20, 2011
hey u will be fine just call on God and he will help you he always helps me
God Bless
God Bless
written by Tiffany326 , January 13, 2011
Your story kinda sounds kinda like mine, me and my boyfriend (fiance) have been trying, and i am only 16, i tihnk i do know everything. and honestly i think i actually am pregnant now.. and i hope he doesnt leave me...
written by dorothyhouston , December 28, 2010
Hey, I know you have probably already had your son and that is amazing, but I am sort of in the same boat as you were. My boyfriend and I were friends for 3 years and lovers for only 3.5 months at the time when we started talking about children. We had talked about having them sometime in the future, whether near or far.
We decided to try and we had agreed that if it did not happen right away, we would stop thinking about it and let life happen as it happens. We tried a few times for the first month and were unsuccessful...at first. The second month, we tried and in late September, we found out that we were in fact pregnant! It was the best day of our lives. A couple weeks later, we told our parents and at first, they were disappointed, but now...everyone is supportive. I was more worried about miscarrying again - I've had two in the past three years - and luckily enough, I didn't nor have I yet! Him and I were living on our own at the time of the pregnancy, so really we made the decision together, because of that. When we found out we were pregnant, we moved into a two bedroom apartment an hour away from all our family. It's been a hard journey as I too am still trying to finish up high school - but I on the other hand am doing online schooling for both high school and college - so I have that advantage here. My fiance is going to be getting a job this year, because we are currently on ODSP - a support program for people with disabilities here in Ontario - but it's not enough. I worry at times, wondering if will be a good mom and whether I'll survive doing this at my age (19). But I always keep in mind that I have a loving fiance by my side, a house to live in that we can afford and lots of family and friends to support us and help us when we need it! And that all typically puts me in a better mood. And of course, knowing we are having a little girl and feeling her kick and move around in me, makes me know for sure I'll be happy and will do whatever it takes to protect her and keep her healthy, as I am now!
Good luck with being a mom, you sound like you want to be a good one and as long as you do your best, you'll succeed!
We decided to try and we had agreed that if it did not happen right away, we would stop thinking about it and let life happen as it happens. We tried a few times for the first month and were unsuccessful...at first. The second month, we tried and in late September, we found out that we were in fact pregnant! It was the best day of our lives. A couple weeks later, we told our parents and at first, they were disappointed, but now...everyone is supportive. I was more worried about miscarrying again - I've had two in the past three years - and luckily enough, I didn't nor have I yet! Him and I were living on our own at the time of the pregnancy, so really we made the decision together, because of that. When we found out we were pregnant, we moved into a two bedroom apartment an hour away from all our family. It's been a hard journey as I too am still trying to finish up high school - but I on the other hand am doing online schooling for both high school and college - so I have that advantage here. My fiance is going to be getting a job this year, because we are currently on ODSP - a support program for people with disabilities here in Ontario - but it's not enough. I worry at times, wondering if will be a good mom and whether I'll survive doing this at my age (19). But I always keep in mind that I have a loving fiance by my side, a house to live in that we can afford and lots of family and friends to support us and help us when we need it! And that all typically puts me in a better mood. And of course, knowing we are having a little girl and feeling her kick and move around in me, makes me know for sure I'll be happy and will do whatever it takes to protect her and keep her healthy, as I am now!
Good luck with being a mom, you sound like you want to be a good one and as long as you do your best, you'll succeed!
written by katiana110 , December 15, 2010
Dont worry im amommy at 17and its hard at times but it gets better 
Promise
Promise written by mommaof1 , December 12, 2010
Hun, Im 17 and i've got two babies that are just under 2 years apart. I was 14 and I didn't plan the baby but I thought I was ready. Me and Ryan had been together for about 10 months and I'd been thinking wouldnt it be great to have a baby, so we started being careless and then suddenly we were meant to grow up, and start being adults. He ran for the hills, but then he came back because he realised he couldnt walk out on me and Harry. I lived with my mum aswell back then but we set up our own house together, had another baby in July 2010 and now were getting married.
Don't be scared of being a failure, everyone brings up their child differently, so what if they dont have all the latest toys but as long as you give your child love then you're never going to be a failure
Don't be scared of being a failure, everyone brings up their child differently, so what if they dont have all the latest toys but as long as you give your child love then you're never going to be a failure
written by pinkguurl15 , December 11, 2010
heey i am cuurently pregnant. im due feb. 17 i was scared when i found out i was pregnant but i got through it. my parents are suppoerting me and everything. im excited. i didnt think i was ready wither but i think im getting used to it.
written by FatEd23 , December 09, 2010
Don't be afraid... You know many people wished to have a baby because it's hard for them to conceive... Your baby is a blessing...
written by Godrealm , December 08, 2010
well we all make mistakes 
there mistakes helps us learn in what fantasy & reality, right & wrong! haha.. my little sister lilliane is 16 & she already have a baby boy she named Bullet (o_O odd name?) we no longer have parents & the father ran away, guess wat she went through it all if she can do it so could you right remember there will always be a place for you here.
"Nero Rolnoke"
there mistakes helps us learn in what fantasy & reality, right & wrong! haha.. my little sister lilliane is 16 & she already have a baby boy she named Bullet (o_O odd name?) we no longer have parents & the father ran away, guess wat she went through it all if she can do it so could you right remember there will always be a place for you here. "Nero Rolnoke"
written by madeline19 , December 01, 2010
everything will go out fine. don't worry. you just have to pray and asked for his assistance & guidance.. be strong for your family.. NOT EVERYBODY HAVE THE CHANCE TO HAVE A BABY..
written by Ryans Mommy , November 26, 2010
breathe girl, youll be okay.
i was in your EXACT situation, and now i have a beautiful baby boy.
things WILL be hard, but your little boy will be well worth it, never thing diffrent.
things will fall in place
i was in your EXACT situation, and now i have a beautiful baby boy.
things WILL be hard, but your little boy will be well worth it, never thing diffrent.
things will fall in place
written by anne88 , November 24, 2010
Hi my name's anne. I felt the same way when I was pregnant at the age of 17. Me and my boyfriend were so excited to have a baby when we found out but not at the right age. Until now I am still living with my mother. We thought it was easy but it is really hard. I am thankful that my mom is always by my side.
written by mar1224 , November 10, 2010
I know you might be scared an confused, i was seventeen and pregnant too. Everything will come together for you believe me, once you see your baby you will be in love with this little human being thats yours and you will know everything will be alright...god will provide for you and your baby.
written by livingwithregret , November 05, 2010
Life usually doesnt turn out the way we "planned" or "envisioned it".. That doesn't make it wrong...Your path and your journey is yours alone. Life is an adventure...There will be highs lows and turns. You sound like you are very smart girl. As long as you are not addicted to drugs or alcohol nothing should stand in your way. Your baby will give you the will desire and strength to move forward. Don't worry...financial stability will come later on....it takes time. There are so many government assistment programs available to people in your situation.Take advantage of all of them. You can get ahead here. If you need help finding any resources let me know. Just relax and breathe easy...dont worry about tomorrow or next week. Just worry about today. Tomorrow will take care of itself. Feeling alone and scared is just human nature...Things will get better. I hope you have a healthy baby.
written by samantha-chelsey , November 02, 2010
hey my names sam,
my comment most probably wont be all too helpful but id just like to say that im in an extremely similar situation that you are, im also only seventeen and i just found out im pregnant, my boyfriend wanted a baby, and i wanted to make him happy , so i gave in, he obviously didnt think all to hard about it because only a few weeks after he finds out, it sinks in, and he decides to make a run for it.....literally, he tried to dissopear today (i say TRIED because he doesnt actually know it. but i know where he is by absolute fluke. i texted someone to hang out and they told me the truth and said he was with him..)anyway, so unless he randomly decides to man up and come back it looks like im doing it on my own. i dont live with my parents - i got kicked out january 2010, and im actually living with him and his parents. so im most likely to find myself homeless unless a miracle happens ( unless he comes back), ive only finished my year 11 certificate and then dropped out. i had such high expectations for myself, im a professional belly dancer, was going to go to tafe and start the long road to being a vet and if all else fails i want to be a body artist, but now i have a baby on the way i have to sit down and change my entire plan! and the plan was muddled up to begin with!
i started freaking out so i started looking at articles on the net, i found yours and it was actually what made me join this site because it makes me realise that even though our situations arent exactly the same, theres someone out there with a similair story thats gotten through so much more of the pregnnancy than i have without having an insane breakdown and ending up in a mental ward
call me weird but its helped me beleive i can atleast make it to the end of the pregnancy knowing im not alone and now im on this site theres support and you know your not the only pregnant teenager out there - even though sometimes you might feel like you are.
i wish everything goes well with the birth of your child- just from reading what youve written i know your going to be a fantastic mum
x
my comment most probably wont be all too helpful but id just like to say that im in an extremely similar situation that you are, im also only seventeen and i just found out im pregnant, my boyfriend wanted a baby, and i wanted to make him happy , so i gave in, he obviously didnt think all to hard about it because only a few weeks after he finds out, it sinks in, and he decides to make a run for it.....literally, he tried to dissopear today (i say TRIED because he doesnt actually know it. but i know where he is by absolute fluke. i texted someone to hang out and they told me the truth and said he was with him..)anyway, so unless he randomly decides to man up and come back it looks like im doing it on my own. i dont live with my parents - i got kicked out january 2010, and im actually living with him and his parents. so im most likely to find myself homeless unless a miracle happens ( unless he comes back), ive only finished my year 11 certificate and then dropped out. i had such high expectations for myself, im a professional belly dancer, was going to go to tafe and start the long road to being a vet and if all else fails i want to be a body artist, but now i have a baby on the way i have to sit down and change my entire plan! and the plan was muddled up to begin with!
i started freaking out so i started looking at articles on the net, i found yours and it was actually what made me join this site because it makes me realise that even though our situations arent exactly the same, theres someone out there with a similair story thats gotten through so much more of the pregnnancy than i have without having an insane breakdown and ending up in a mental ward
call me weird but its helped me beleive i can atleast make it to the end of the pregnancy knowing im not alone and now im on this site theres support and you know your not the only pregnant teenager out there - even though sometimes you might feel like you are.
i wish everything goes well with the birth of your child- just from reading what youve written i know your going to be a fantastic mum
x
written by miszst3phanyx0 , October 28, 2010
hi koda im stephany. I found out i was pregnant when i was 16. your not alone. everything is gonna work out i promise. me and my boyfriend have been together for 2 years and putting a baby in the mix is hard work. you guys are going to fight about the baby and about other family members being with the baby but everything will work out. and its the best feeling to have a kid. but it is hard work. do not give up. keep strong. good luck
written by Lady_Y , October 15, 2010
You've got people who care here... Above all you;ve got God.
I've been through the very same thing ata much younger age.. You'll make it.
Love. Yolanda
I've been through the very same thing ata much younger age.. You'll make it.
Love. Yolanda
written by heather.xx , October 12, 2010
hi I am Heather i found out i was pregnant last year july when i was 15 i still did home school and finished grade 9 i then had my little angel 39 weeks pregnant so full term,,he was born 7th April born sleeping (he had passed away) we named him Jordan Antony Bennett and i wish he was here so much i was still finishing off grade 10 and still am i am now 9 weeks pregnant and trust me yu will be fine. yeah you didnt really plan it through but you will get through it. when he old enough to go to day care you can get a job, do a corse or anything you set your mind on next year i will be doing a tafe corse on child care. so i was pregnant finished grade 9, lost a baby and i am still finishing grade 10 and i am now pregnant and yeah it can be hard at times and next year i am scared of failing in the corse im doing but we always get though it. stay strong.
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