I thought I'd post something about mourning after an abortion... I think so many of us struggle with that part of our healing, because,

• we don't feel we deserve the right to heal; or
• we don't know how to or where to begin

Recognize that it is normal and good to mourn any loss, such as the loss of an aborted child. Recognize also that it

God knows I don't know what to do anymore. As soon as everything starts going right I have to mess it up and set myself back months. I was coping really well and getting past the depression, but I just can't do this anymore. I can't play pretend and go back to living everyday going through the motions. I keep torturing myself, wanting a baby with such ferocity that I want to kill myself

if i could only see your face baby i would rest a while

if i could only see your gummy toothless smile

if i could only hold you while your tears fall

and you wail with a deafening call

if i could only be your mother one more time

 

if i could only wipe your face when you have face paint made of food

if i could only teach you how to tell the bad from

Goodbye my beautiful baby.

I only knew you for a very short time, but already I loved you. Im sorry I was not good enough for you, Im sorry You had to die. Im sorry God took your from me so soon. When I die please forgive me and walk with me in heaven. I am so sorry, my unborn child. I dont know how but I miscarried you. I guess God had other plans for us.


I

Just because I chose abortion as an option, it doesn't mean that I've lost my right to feel loss... My loss IS real. My grief IS real. My pain IS real. My anger IS real... But what exactly is lost?

Since the abortion, for as long as I can remember, I have been depressed on one level or another. I've felt that something important is missing, and has left me feeling

ANGEL IN THE MOON LIGHT
By Joan Estelle High

I walk all alone on the ocean shore,
I watch the waves flow out to sea.
I've never been so alone and poor,
Since they have taken you from me.
My heart beat seems in harmony.
Within the ocean's ebb and flow.
I have tried to release all the pain.
But it just won't seem to let go.
I can hear the ocean

 

did they put you

in a jar

or a tube,

 and tossed you aside

in a rusty old  sink

like garbage?

 

 id like to call up God

and ask him why.....

 

 why my cries were

never heard, 

 and why noone ever cared,

and why i was left without you..

 

 why