actually my pregnancy was not planned i was 16 and i came from foster care with no where to live so i moved in with my sister, from there my boyfriend(now my husband) helped me rent a room (which was not such a great place to live) i worked 2 jobs, then i idid something stupid got arrested and fired from both jobs, so the only thing to do was move in with my boyfriend, he lived at his mothers house and she did not even know i lived there cause his room was in the basement, about 2 months after i moved in we broke up and i had 1 week to move.that day my friend called me and told me she might pregnant and wanted me to go with her to buy a test, since it came with 2 she made me take one, funny thing is she told me to tell her her results cause she didn't want to look, so i looked at mine and then hers, she had one line so i said omg your pregnant, when she looked at it she said it only has 1 line why would you think i was pregnant and thats when it hit me, i told her cause my has 2 lines and i'm not pregnant!! so again we headed to the store and brought another test with 2 in it and there it was in front of me 3 postive results. everything just hit me at once i knew i couldn't get an abortion so right there i took my cigs out my pocket book and threw them in the trash. no was time to tell my bf, he came to my friends and he really didn't know what to say he was only 19. his mom was happy but my sisters on the other hand tried over and over to convince me to get an abortion, my oldest sister hade her son at 17 and the other who is only 1yr older then me had her son at 15. i knew it was hard but i had to take responsabilty for my actions, i saw my mother at a store oneday when i was already 4months and she looked at me and said wow you look pregnant and thats how she found out, she is into drugs and everything and i just don't talk to my dad, so my sisters were pretty much all i had, and my baby's grandma she treated me like i was her daughter even though she didn't like me, she speaks spanish and i understand a little, i heard her telling people it was because she felt bad for me, anyway i did not let anybody convince me to abort my baby. during my pregnancy i felt trapped even thought of suicided but i couldn't do that to my baby. when i was 6months preg i was told my baby would have down syndrom and spineabifda and that i could do an abortion legally cause ther was something wrong with the pregnancy and it was a health risk to me. again i refused this was my baby mental defect or not, my bf and his mother started showing me oics of his cousn who had down syndrom and couldn't walk and just keep telling me that i wouldn't be able to care for a \"retarted\" baby, they said he also had hydronerprosis which is kidney problems, the only person i had that i felt understood me was my baby, who i already loved so much, i read to him in my belly and let him listen to the baby einstien cds. i didn't really have any friends and my sisters were to busy ith there kids, so it was just me and my bf, and when we were alone i could tell that he loved this baby as much as i did. so nov. 22 i had my baby a healthy 9lb boy, no defects at all, they took him to do surgery right after he was born for his kidney's about 15 mins later they brought him back and said there was nothing wrong at all, they were showing me the sonograms that clearly showed his enflamed kidneys taken 1 day before i gave birth but god loved him as much as i did he was perfect absolutely nothing wrong. but... when he was 3 months me and his dad split, i was living in a tiny room with my son, at this point so many emotions were running through my head my bf and his mom threaten to take custody cause of where i live and how i was taking care of him but they kicked me out on purpose, i thought about giving him up to them aor adoption aor just leaving him at a safe haven but i caouldn't do it, i would yell at him , get mad at him but he was ony 4months old and would just look at me with his innocent eyes as if he was telling me it's not his fault, i detcahed myself from him i wpould just let him cry, i did all the things that needed to be done feed him , change him, bath him and make sure he was not cold but i couldnt get that connection with him as if i felt it was all his fault, then oneday something just clicked and i screw his father what was happen between us was not his fault this is the same baby i fought so hard to keep and wheater i wanted to i was a mother and i needed to be there for him emotionally from that day on my world revovled around him my angel, the lil boy who would wipe my tears when i cry, who just knew when i was sad and ask \" mommy are you mad at me?\" my response was i could never be mad at you, your the only thingh that makes me happy evev at the worst times, when i was sad he knew it and would do something to make me laugh, he is my livesaver my guardian angel, with out him i don't think i could continue living, i can't breath a day with out that little boy, i continue through this hard life a don't give up for him, he is the most amazing little boy i have ever known and not just cause he is my son but everyone who has meet my son tells me the samething, he does not like to see people sad or crying and will five you anything you ask for, you can ask for his shirt and no lie he will take it off. but has for goverment help i did recieve some help they paid my med bills, helped pay for fooad and daycare, i also got help from a program called T.A.S.A, they gave me car seats and i got free pampers for 8months it was only suppose to be 3 months but everyone there really like my son so they continue giving them to me, free cloths brand new not used, they were a big help but i really had nobady for emotional support i have learned to be this strong on my own and with the help of my son......sorry it's so long any question feel free to write me