I'm 19 and I just found out a couple of day ago that I'm about 4 weeks pregnant. I'm so confused on whether or not I should keep the baby. My b/f wants me to have an abortion, but says he's still ok with me keeping the baby if I wanted to. I told my mom and she is completely supportive with whatever I want to do, but the problem is I have no idea what I want to do. It seems like the more I think about it the less I'm sure of what I want. Please, any imput to help me sort out my thoughts would be much appreciated!

Tae,
It is completely normal to feel confused at a time like this! It takes time to adjust to this reality: Your life has changed, You are a mother! I know abortion might seem like an easy way out - but it isn't. Abortion doesn't change the past, but it does affect the future. This website is full of stories of girls who have had abortions and experienced deep regret. (standupgirl.com/site/index.php?option=co...74&Itemid=41 for example)

But no one ever regrets giving her child life! It is a good thing pregnancy takes 9 months - you'll have time to sort out your feelings and make decisions for the future. You may be ready to be a Mommy. Fantastic! There are a lot of resources out there to help you be a great one. You may realize you aren't ready. That is O.K. Coming to that conclusion doesn't make you irresponsible, selfish, or cruel. (and, like I said, you'll have months to think about it.) Placing your child for adoption is not 'abandoning' her - it is providing for her a family who IS ready, and longing to raise her. Either way, you will NEVER regret having this baby, and you will be amazed by the love you will experience.

If you want to talk, you can e-mail me at This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it

Love,
julie<br><br>Post edited by: Julie, at: 2005/10/04 03:26

hey tae, it is a good thing your mum si there for you whatever but what you need to do is think about whats best for you. abortions are the easy way out but it is a childs life that you will be giving up!! stay strong and remeber everyone on this site is here for you good luk and remeber to let me know what ever you decide xxxxpaigexxxx

Tae,

I'm currently 8 months pregnant and went through the same decisions as you just a few months back. I'm older, being 30, but let me tell you, the questioning of whether you're ready or not ready for a child doesn't get any easier as you age. This is my first child and I considered abortion in the beginning because I was trying to weigh the impact of my child's birth on the father, myself, and her. He didn't want her and was adamant about not being involved. I ultimately chose to keep her, as I realized that if I trusted my instinct/intuition, that ANY amount doubt or questioning about aborting her meant that I couldn't have handled the decision to do so. If I knew then what I know now, there is ABSOLUTELY NO WAY I would have even considered abortion. On June 26th I felt her move for the first time. It was amazing. I think abortion is an easier decision earlier on because you don't feel your child's movements. As small as your child is at this early stage he/she already has all of the parts that make him/her distinctly human. Ultimately, his/her presence in your life will be your greatest gift and in the end his/her existence is more impactful and important than you can possibly realize at this point. If you choose to keep your child, remember that the father may not stay around. I truly believe that men have an easier time making an abortion or abandonment decision because they don't have the physical connection with their child. Ask the women in your life what it was like for them to be pregnant, getting as much detail as possible. You'll learn more about your body and yourself through this experience than you can even imagine. To really test to see if you're able to handle an abortion emotionally, go to a support clinic where they can have you listen to your child's heartbeat. You'll know then.<br><br>Post edited by: sweettea, at: 2005/10/06 04:32

Dear !
My advise is, please keep this baby.
Choose life !!!!
I know you struggle right now because it will be the hardest decision
that you ever make but please save this life and God will bless you !!!!

hey gurl you are not alone i am 19 years old and i found out a couple of weeks ago that i am pregnant i might be about 5 weeks and a half what ever u do dont have an abortion you will regret it i myself plan on keeping this baby i am going to give this baby life morning sickness and sleepiness in the end is all worth it my mom had three abortion before she had me and my 5 yearold sister now i dont want to make the same mistake she did . abortion is freaky and scary to think about it . dont do it . plz.