My name is Kristal. Im 15 years old. My boyfriend is 18. And we were together for almost two years before the abortion. Which I just recently had on Novemeber 24, 2007. My boyfriend was pretty supportive at the time. He said that no matter what I chose to do he would be here for me. Which I completely believed. So the day we went to have the abortion he came with me. I was really nervous, but at the time I honestly wasn't thinking about the effects it would have on me afterwards. However, that completely changed as I walked into the operating room. I seen the suction device and the little jar that my baby would soon occupy. Also, there was a tray of metal utensils laying there that looked like something you would see in a horror movie. They did let my boyfriend come in there with me. But they wouldnt let him touch me or comfort me in any way. When the doctor walked into the room, I was laying on the operating table with my feet in the stirrups. He told me to just make sure to remember to breathe. When the doctor gave me the shot to numb me I realized that what I was about to do I would never be able to take back. Then he started inserting the metal rods. Which hurt more than anything I have ever experienced in my life. I didnt know what to do. I just layed there and prayed to god that what I was doing was the right thing. When I turned my head to look at my boyfriend I seen him sitting in the corner with his head in his hands. And that hurt me more than anything. Then the doctor turned on the suction device. And as he put it in me I felt this weird sensation in my stomach. My hands were folded at the bottom of my chest. And I could feel this rippling feeling. Honestly, I felt like I was going to be sick. As he pulled it out I looked down for the first time and seen this long clear tube covered in blood. Which I have flashbacks of to this day. When the doctor was finished he looked up at me and smiled. And his exact words were \"You were the best one today, you are really a trooper arent you?\". At that point if I could've got up on my own. I would have smacked the doctor for even thinking about saying that to me. Before I could even say anything to my boyfriend they made him leave the room. The nurse asked me if i could sit up. Which I did. And then she put my clothes on for me and helped me to walk in the next room. Which was what they called the recovery room. They sat me in a chair and gave me some pills and put a heating pad on my stomach. After about 30 minutes the nurse asked me to go to the bathroom to see how much I was bleeding. Then they let me leave. The entire way home my boyfriend and i didnt say a word. I felt so weak and sick I just wanted to be alone. He took me home right then, but came back later that night. We got into an argument that night about something stupid. And i didnt talk to him for a few days. When he finally called me we talked for a few minutes. Then his exact words were \"You are a selfish bitch for killing my kid, he was my kid to u kno?.\" I had no clue what to say back. But obviously he wasnt finished with what he had to say. Cuz then he said You arent the one that had to sit there and watch your kid get sucked up into a jar. I cry every night about that. I was so amazed at how he thought I was o.k with it. About how he thought I never stayed up all night crying about what I had done. Or how everytime I seen a little baby I thught about how it could be mine. Honestly, I did feel bad about making him go through that with me. I wish I could've saved him that hurt of being in there with me. I wish that he didnt have to see or feel what I did. But he did. And I couldnt take it back. Well, needlesss to say within a week he had broken up with me. I just wish I knew how he could just let me go through this alone. I would never do something like that to him. But atleast now I know how much he really cared for me....Well this is my abortion story. I live it every day of my life.
