Hi, I'm Eva, I'm 19 years old and 16 months ago I had an abortion. Physically I've recovered but emotionally I don't think it'll ever get any better:( I don't know where to turn to anymore. Therepy was the biggest load of nonesense I've ever tried, the old quack upset me more than she helped... I think hearing "It'll be ok"; "You'll get over it" and for me, the worst of all, "You'll have another baby". I DON'T WANT ANOTHER BABY!!! I want the one I lost, the one I never held and loved and comforted.
I suffer from major depression, everyday is a struggle to keep up appearances and stop myself suffering another breakdown. It's like I'm an empty shell of my former being, I have no interset in doing the things I once found entertaining, all I think about, day in and day out, is falling pregnant again... But my boyfreind doesn't want to hear a thing about it. When I mentioned it to him, he asked if that was all that would make me happy... and yes, from where I'm standing, I think that is all thats going to help.
I think this is more of a rant than a post but I'm desperate to find a coping mechanism, hear from other girls who are also trying to heal and those who have learned to forgive themselves.