Hi April, I found out in the beggining of december I was pregnant. I had a feeling I was b/c I wasn 't feeling like myself. I felt little cramps, and I thought I was going to have my monthly visit..Well, I took 3 pregnancy test and they were all positive. My boyfriend all ready has two children from a previous relationship, and he couldn't handle the strain of another child. I had my abortion on December 21, 2004. It was the worst decision I had ever made in my life!! I regret it til this day. I have a good job, so I would have been able to handle raising MY child if my boyfriend didn't want to be there. When I got to the clinic, my boyfriend waited for me outside. He stayed there for 5 hours, which was okay to have the support, but I cried the enitre way home. The so called \"twilight sleep\", wasn't a twilight sleep. I felt everything, my legs were in straps, and thank god they were there or I would have kicked the doc in the face. I felt him poking me with the vacuum, and i remember screaming and telling him how much it hurt, all he could do was to tell me to relax....he wasn't the one going through the pain, how could he tell me to relax. This is the first time I ever talk about this, it feels good to finally get it out. I think about this everyday. I am 20 years old, I pray to god every day to forgive me for what I did, at least I know my child is with him and well taken care of. One day he/she may come back to me when I am ready. For anyone considering an abortion, an abortion is not easily forgotten. I know. Not only is it a part of the person you love, but it is a piece of you. There are different options to take. PLEASE CONSIDER ALL THE OPTIONS. I don't want anyone to feel the way I feel

I hate myself for doing that and if I could go back, I would keep my baby. I am still with my boyfriend, and we haven't talked about the abortion at all. All he has said is that one day we can start a family when we are ready, but god has a plan for everyone, and I believe he planned to send me a child, just like he may have for you. Thanks for listening hopefully I have helped someone make their choice.
Ana