Hi Im new here. I decided to post my story because Im tired of not telling anyone the whole story and keeping it to myself. I need to tell someone. I am only 18 years old and I got pregnant last year at age 17. I found out I wsa pregnant the lats day of school. I took a pregnancy test and it showed positive. I couldnt believe it. I started crying. My boyfriend told me not to worry that all I had to do is get an abortion. He did not understand !!! i told him that I wanted to keep the baby he responded that he was not going to stay with me. He said he was going to help me with the baby and give me money but he did not want anything to do with me. My parents are very strict and I know they would have kicked me out of my house. I decided to have an abortion. I regret it now. I want my baby. I was really depressed at the beginning. I even thought of killing myself but I am much better now. I try not to think about it much. I was only 6 weeks and 5 days pregnant. Even though I did not know what I aws going to have I felt in my heart that it was going to be a baby boy. I feel bad and sometimes i want to get pregnant again and this one I want to keep. I want a baby but I know I am not ready. I miss my baby boy and i hope he can forgive his mommy for being selfish and only thinking about herself. I blame my self and my boyfrined. I hate myself for doing this to him. I will never forgive myself.

OMG I know exactly how you feel. I had an abortion about 6 months ago. I had and at times still have the same symptoms your experiencing. I also thoguht about having another baby to replace the first, but in reality I know I can NEVER replace the first. My boyfriend is the one who drilled that one into my head because I truly was on a mission at one time to replace the first baby with another. Trust me it will get better or at least a little and i do mean little easier to cope with. No time soon but eventually you'll sorda kinda move on i guess it the best phrase I can come up with. Even though I still havent, but hey if you EVER need someone to talk to i'm here. Its kinda conforting to know here a story so similar to mine.

Hiya Hun, u deff came to the right place to talk about it. i can definitely feel for you because i was in the same situation, but slightly different, like many others. the best thing to do is to talk about it not keep it bottled up and keep emotionally hurting yourself. i feel your pain but just know there are people out there that do care, and your story can help other people change their minds before its too late. i know we cant turn back time, but the best thing to do is look forward and know that things will get better.thats what i do and im getting better! you also shouldnt try to get pregnant to try and fill the void you have for your unborn.you will always feel that it isnt the same. and still wish u changed your mind, wait till you know you have the right kind of relationship and stability to support a child. keep your head up babe, better things will come in time you just have to wait. for now do what you have to do to make yourself feel better, just remember you are not alone. xx