Hi there,

I'm 21 and I have a wonderful family; my boyfriend and myself, and my wonderful 8 month old son Nathan. He was born in February09.

After my pregnancy I promised my parents, my boyfriend, and myself that I wouldn't have another child for another few years. Also, money is tight, and we're barely making ends meet as is.

But this past October my supply of Micronor ended, and since I was already a few days into my cycle I was advised against starting my new pack of birth control, Alesse. So my boyfriend and I decided to use condoms for October before I started my new pack in November.

However, on October 6th we decided to have some spontaneous sex, resulting in no condom. My boyfriend used the withdrawl method and when we finished we cleaned up and moved on with our lives.

It's now October 24th and I'm pregnant again. That one bout of random sex resulted in a little mister/miss growing in me.

I'm torn. We can't afford this. My boyfriend is relentlessly asking me to abort. "We already have Nathan, we can't have another baby. Not yet."

I agree that this is too soon, I'm not ready to be pregnant again. I'm going crazy with my first child, everything is so much harder than I thought it would be. I love him so much but some days I struggle so much.

But I also firmly believe that abortion should not be used as birth control. And that this was our doing, we were the ones who failed to use contraception, how can I kill a baby if it's our fault?

I don't know what to do. I am so heartbroken that I may have to abort, but I'm not sure I'm ready for #2 yet.

I'm sorry this is so long. I need somewhere to vent...

Hey there, I am sorry to hear of your predicament...I know it has got to be hard to get pregnant this soon after giving birth but I do agree with your statement about not using abortion as a birth control....they say many times and it is proven over and over again that women become a mother when they know they are pregnant and a man becomes a father when he sees and holds his baby for the first time...I know the economy is bad right now but there is so much help and resources out there...look at it this way, if you have a boy already then you have clothes to pass on...if you have a girl well that's what baby showers are for, there is WIC
www.fns.usda.gov/wic/
Food banks, food stamps, hygiene vouchers, energy assistance, holiday dinner baskets, clothing drives, exchange stores, thrift stores, yard sales, craigslist, ebay, etc....look in your phone book under adult and family services in the government pages to make an appointment to find out more about your local resources, also here is a number for Optionline, 1-800-395-HELP, they can give you the number and location to the closest Pregnancy Resource Center to you where you can get some counseling to help you make a final decision on what you want to do, they also have programs to earn "baby bucks" you can use the baby bucks to buy diapers, clothes, cribs, strollers, maternity clothes, etc...the big issue right now is between you and your boyfriend, ultimately this is your choice, you are physically carrying the baby after all, if you are worried about him leaving, if he is going to leave he will whether you are pregnant or not but you will be the one left with the regret not him...honey it may be a big shock, you may have gotten pregnant sooner than you wanted to or even promised to, but that is life and things come up...you can make it through and you have several months to save up and line things out....I am here for you and I am full of ideas on how to save money and stretch the budget...please let me know what you are thinking and if I can answer any more questions...Love Meg

I just wanted to give you some encouragement that you CAN handle this! I'm praying for you and your boyfriend, I wish you two the BEST of luck! You will never regret carrying this little blessing to term.