Hey everyone, I had a doctors appt today and I am 50% and 1cm dilated, I was hoping for more because of all the pain I have been in but I am glad that something is happening down there...Believe it or not I am so freaked out, this is my third time and I am so scared of delivering the baby, it is so close and so real and I am almost in panic attack mode...Due to the fact that we are unsure of what is going on with our baby (will it live or die?) and that we have not found out the sex we have opted to not have a baby shower and we have not bought one scrap of clothing, all we are going to do is buy an infant car seat and a boy and a girl outfit to bring to the hospital so I feel so unprepared and just kind of crazy, but still in the event of losing our baby I don't want to sit here and stare at a mound of neutral clothes that will never be worn so this approach is just more practical and emotionally sensitive to our circumstances...Please pray for us and we are getting so close and as I am so freaked out, I am excited to but the scary part is overwhelming for now, I just want to be done and have no more what ifs....I will keep you updated...Love Meg
