So I just registered myself with standupgirl and think this is a GREAT site. Right now I'm 23 yrs old and I have a 4 yr old boy. When i got pregnant with my son i was 18 just graduated from high school. His father didnt want me to have the baby and neither did my parents. I ended up keeping the baby regardless of all the problems my family and boyfriend gave me. It was really hard for me because my boyfriend was abusive both physically and emotionally. I had my son and am so glad I did. I love him so much and he is my life. Since then we've been through ups and downs since I'm a single mom and his dad has not been in the picture since the baby was born. I just found out the other day that I am pregnant again. My boyfriend of 9 months keeps telling me he's not ready for a baby and wants me to have an abortion. I am torn between having the abortion or having the baby. I dont know what to do!!! I'm doing pretty good by myself raising my son, but I dont know what will happen if I keep this baby. I asked my boyfriend what would he do and he tells me he doesnt know. And the only thing he says is that he's not ready. I know my heart will tear apart if I go through the abortion. But if i keep the baby i don't want to make my situation worst. I know I'm not financially stable and am somewhat struggling with taking care of my son. I dont know what to do and i need help. My family would probably hate the fact that i'm pregnant again. They didn't support me much through my last pregnancy and kind of casted me out. Now they love my son and are fine with it. But how am i suppose to bring up this to them??? I'm so lost and confused I need help. Any advice would help. My tears just keep constantly falling since i know i have this decision to make.

Wow. My advice to you is be strong. Are you living on your own and supporting yourself? If so, you know what it's like to pay bills and take care of your son. It will give you a good idea of what it will be like to support another child. Personally, I could never have an abortion. Unfortunately, some women do feel it is the best choice for them. If that is not the decision you want to make, DON'T DO IT. It's YOUR body and YOUR BABY. Remember, there is always adoption to consider. Good luck!

Hey girl,

I can't imagine how you are feeling right now but one thing that struck me when I was reading your post was how strong you must be to have gone it alone with your son when everyone was against you. It must have seemed nearly impossible at the time and yet you have managed! The same is true for now. It may seem so overwhelming but picture yourself in 4 years time with a beautiful little family of 3! Now that you have come to know your precious son would you ever imagine having aborted him? The same will be true for this precious life you are carrying. Soon you will grow to know and love him/her. Don't make a decision you could regret for the rest of your life. Your family have accepted you back once, they will do it again. As for your boyfriend, he is probably just scared and may even, if given time, come to be comfortable with the idea. And if he doesn't, then you can do better for you and your son and your son's future little sibling.

Just from reading your post I know you have it in you to fight for the life of this little baby and I know you will be strong enough to come through yet again. We are all here to support you through it!

Stand up girl!

You have brought up one child so you CAN do this again. You said its hard but very rewarding. Would you want to be in a position to tell your son when he is older that he could have had a little sibling, not to mention what sort of emotional impact its going to have on ur life if you do abort. I've heard from girls saying that they are pregnant and financially they cant do it BUT they do and its not as hard as it seems honestly.
I hope you figure out what u want and dont make a mistake on ur behalf

You're definitley in a scary situation and I hate to say this but the right decision is the hardest one, you have to give the baby life! Whether or not you choose to keep baby (adoption??) is up to you but abortion is not the way to go, just look at your son and think about what if you aborted him?? I'm looking at my beautiful two week old son and it makes me cry thinking that at one point I was thinking of abortion, those beautiful eyes, soft skin and thick hair would all be gone and I would be left with nothing. Abortion is so wrong girl, everyone deserves a chance!! In a lot of ways adoption is a great solution, both you, baby and baby's family win in this decision! Abortion hurts everyone! I'm only fifteen and I was so scared to find out I was pregnant, but unlike you I had (and have) lots of support from my family and boyfriend so I'm not going to say I know exactly what you are going through. All I know is abortion is not the way! I think for the best of you and your son bringing another baby into your life may be too much right now but I am sure the family that can not have children and are financially and emotionally stable would love to bring your child into their arms to call him or her their own. Please do the right thing and give baby a chance, everyone will thank you for it! Look into adoption before you make any more decisions and know that all the girls (and some guys) here at Standupgirl are here for you to offer support whenever you need, don't be afraid to reach out we are all here to help!!

Talk to me anytime and I hope this hard patch in your life gets better, Good luck!
Anna

You've done it once, and you can do it again.
Just think for a second, pregnancy doesn't happen without a reason. If it happened, it was meant to be.
And think about this: your son will have a sibling! You are a strong woman, and you can do this.
I'm here if you need to chat, I had my son at 17 and he's two and a half, and I've being doing it alone the whole time as well...