It is my prayer Suzu, that you come back to this site to see this response. I am so sorry you were forced to give up your dream. Forced to give up the answer to your prayer--twins. I pray that your broken heart will be healed. That all the pain will be gone. That all the torment in the memory of your children would cease. That the God of Abraham, Issac and Jacob would heal your woundedness and help you through your grief.
I am a guy, so I will never experience birth or the pain of abortion, but I always try to be a defender, comforter and friend of the broken. I'll never know that pain, but I know the pain of loss. It is different for everyone and as individual, sometimes as personalities, eye color, shape, and size. If God answered your prayers once, He can answer them again. Again, I wish you well.
B. Wade