So, for those who dont know my story, here's a short version: I got pregnant with my bf of 3 yrs, and had the baby way too early. She survived 5 days and died less than a week after my parents-in-law. We lived with them, & the early labour was because of their loss. I moved out of my bfs a lil after to relax my nerves.

Last nite I visited him and decided to stay the night, and his phone rang, and he didnt answer it on purpose (hes not that kinda guy) and when i asked him to see the phone he hid it. So, as suspicious as i was, i snuck out the phone when he fell asleep. I found MANY text msgs, to a grl. Stuff like \"i been lookin for someone like you for a while and now that i found you, i wont let go.\" I cant stress myself anymore, but Im deeply deeply hurt because I dont deserve to deal with something like this after the death of so many loved ones, my child being one of them.

Oh goodness.That is way unfair. Was he the one instigating the texts-I mean,did it seem like he was chasing her or she was chasing him? She could just be a bit obsessed,and he doesn't want you to know in case you worry. He may not care about her at all,it could all be on her side- but obviously you need to ask him

If it does sem like he has a thing with this girl, then maybe this is his way of coping with his bereavement?he may not want to hurt you,but maybe he needs an outlet. It could mean nothing.You need to talk to him.You don't deserve this,after what you've been through,but try to be sympathetic- he's been through a hard time too,and he may just be coping in his own way

I am sorry for your lost, I can not imagine what you must be going through right now but i can relate to the why momemt. All i can say is that you must begin to live for you. As much as you have been through you need to help yourself and do the things that make you happy and eliminate the foolishness from your life. Ask him about it. Maybe he is having a hard time dealing (trust me im not excusing) but see if this is something that can and is worth salvaging. If not please move on. You do not want to be with a man who does not want to be with you. I am presently working around the corner from my child's father's mistress. It does not feel good at all. Take teh strength GOD has blessed you with and continue with your life. I wish you the best of luck. God Bless

I know after what you've been through breaking up will seem like just another loss, but staying with him will be even worse for you. The hurt will be even greater if he's truly messing around, and I doubt it will stop if he's got the balls to do that so short a time after losing his parents and your baby. Please \"relax your nerves\" even more by moving on with your life in another direction. Take care.

girl, dump [him]...yu can DOOO sooo much better

Ditch the guy no matter how bad it feels to loose him....if I were you I would surround yourself with a good support system go to a good Non-denominational bible teaching church and get plugged into a bible study...you would be surprised how many people in churches have been through hard stuff in their lives...sometimes people who go to church act like they are better than people who dont go to church but the truth is we are all rotten sinners!!! People mistake church as a place that you go to if you have all your ducks in a row but it is not!!! The church is a hospital for those who are hurting...I was just reading in Matthew today that Jesus went into the temple and drove out all of the hypocrites and began healing the blind and the lame.....it sounds like you have alot of hurt and grief in your life and the best place to be healed is in a group of people who love the Lord and who will pray for you and counsel you. One day you will meet a man who is worthy to be with you...until then there are others out there (even in the church) who are hurting and with your experience you can relate and understand...let the Lord use your story to encourage others to not give up...like myself...I work at a funeral home sometimes...I have lost many close friends and family members...I know how I wanted to be loved during the time of loss so therefore I love others in the same manner...I hope this helped and I will be praying for you..Love and Prayers...Meg