I agree completely with tattudemom.
My wife and I lost a five month old baby on Mother's day, May 14, 2000 due to meningitis, hydrocephalus with pneumonia as the immediate cause of death. I still mourn Jake's death since I was really involved in taking care of him. His elder brother still mourns him as well as he was so close to his baby brother. Did we know about his sickness? No. He was pronounced perfectly healthy when he was born. We'd go in for regular check-ups every month. He eventually had a fever on a Thursday which didn't subside. The pediatrician then told us not to worry. We took him to my pediatrician aunt by Saturday and while she was looking at him, he started convulscing and we rushed him to a hospital. By Sunday afternoon, we had lost him. Honestly, it hurts so much writing this.
But even as I write this, I'm looking at my four-year old daughter who's sleeping seven feet away from me. Her three-year old sister is downstairs playing. These two angels of mine never knew their brother but we tell them about him and their other sister whom we also lost. I absolutely love the three children that God has allowed me to keep and the loss of Jake has actually been the cement, as it were, that keeps our family together. We know that we are together as a family and that's our choice and that we wouldn't have it any other way.
When Isabelle (the four-year old) was still months old, I was really, really scared. I was so scared that what happened to Jake would happen again in whatever way. It didn't. Though God, in his wisdom and love, will do what He wills, I trust that his love for us encompasses everything and goes beyond anrything we can ever hope to understand. I trust in his love for all my children, a loe that exceeds my own. I trust in his love for me and I trust in his love for you.
Take care and keep this in mind: Be not afraid.
Erick